Denial

Greg had been acting normal since before we left the hospital. It has made it easy to dismiss the idea that he has cancer. Our days at home proceeded as usual – we started into our daily school routine, we made our weekly trip to the library and raided the shelves of anything desert related, the biome we would be studying for the next two weeks. I had a few good friends show up unannounced with their mops and brooms and began cleaning. I was ever so thankful, yet felt it was entirely unnecessary. I felt fine. I was showered, dressed, and even had makeup on. My kids were all healthy. I was perfectly capable. I think maybe I was in denial.

The reality of his cancer hit me on Wednesday late afternoon when the nurse at the oncologist’s office said they had him scheduled to start his chemotherapy tomorrow. Tomorrow?!? I’m not ready to see him in pain and be miserable. I’m not ready to be away from my other kids the majority of the day, I’m not ready to make the final call about moving forward with this treatment. I’m not ready for him to start on Saturday, let alone tomorrow! She was able to set the start date for his chemotherapy back to the scheduled date – Saturday. Phew.

After a few other frustrations with the office and the hospital, late Thursday night we applied online for a second opinion at the City of Hope. They called the next morning and told me the reports and scans they would need. The information and scans she was requesting should have taken, in her opinion, a few business days to obtain. Miraculously, within a few hours, the nurse at the oncologists’ office had faxed over all the needed reports, the CT and PET scans were put on disks and ready for pick up, and the pathologist had already talked to the City of Hope nurse and was willing to expedite the copying of the slides and have them available for pick up in the morning. Before we knew it, we were scheduled for a second opinion at the City of Hope on Monday morning.

I feel good. Mainly because I am excited to get a second opinion from a Lymphoma specialist – before starting chemotherapy - and to feel the peace of mind of knowing we are making a better-informed decision. Partially because that means we are putting off chemotherapy for a few more days.

Will told me that his coworkers donated some of their hours so that he would spend time taking care of Greg. I cried tears of gratitude.

We acknowledge the hand of Almighty God in the answering of all of our prayers on Greg’s behalf. Please continue to keep us in your prayers.